Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(860): View more from Connecticut

I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.

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(505): View more from New Mexico

No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens

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(614): View more from Ohio

Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers

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(571): View more from Virginia

I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed

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19 People Confess The Worst Things They Have Been Accused Of
Read it at the TFLN blog
(479): View more from Arkansas

He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.

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(502): View more from Kentucky

I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic

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(505): View more from New Mexico

I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

The stripper told Tom to sort his life out

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(937): View more from Ohio

I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday

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