just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
my shit smells like andre
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize