he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
