Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
You smell like stripper and shame
Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Randomize
