that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
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