yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
Randomize
