take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.