So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
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Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
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And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
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