So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Randomize