I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
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