One girl and one boy is just not enough.
What a fucking waste of an outfit
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Randomize