You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
Randomize
