When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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