do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
A bitchslap is in order.
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