is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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