brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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