I heard we made out
So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
