Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Randomize
