The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize
