Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
