I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
Randomize
