i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
