1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
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