Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
Randomize
