we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
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