ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
