ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
Randomize
