love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
Randomize
