her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
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