dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize