I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
