worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
