All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Randomize
