i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
