1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
