Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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