About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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