Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
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