So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
