just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
