her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
I have fence marks all over my body
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
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