What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
Randomize