you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
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