So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
