I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
Never underestimate the power of titties
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
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