so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
