"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
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