Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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