So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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