He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
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