i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize
